Dream interpretation and istikhara
Many cultures have linked dreams with answers to one’s istikhara, yet we understand from the Sunnah that there are three types of dreams: those from Allah, imbued with meaning; the regurgitated thoughts of our nafs; and those from Shaytan [Sahih Muslim #2263]. We might wish to believe ourselves divinely inspired through our dreams, but often it is merely our nafs and the jumble of our daily thoughts manifesting. For instance, if we are contemplating a marriage proposal and praying istikhara, and this potential spouse appears frequently in our dreams, it might simply reflect our desire and preoccupation with that person.
Reflect on the words of the du’a: “O Allah, if You know that this matter [mention the thing to be decided] is good for me in my religion, my livelihood, my worldly affairs, and in the hereafter, then decree it for me, make it easy for me, and bless it for me.” This supplication does not request Allah to reveal the path through dreams; rather, it seeks His guidance to facilitate what is truly beneficial and to make it easy for us.
Can someone else pray istikhara for you?
There exists a peculiar practice wherein individuals seek out someone deemed “more pious” to perform istikhara on their behalf, expecting that person to receive a dream as an answer. Often, financial compensation is given for this supposed service. However, the du’a of istikhara is precise in its wording and deeply personal in its nature; it is a dialogue between the individual and Allah. While it is always beneficial to ask our loved ones to pray for us in general, the notion of delegating the two rak'ahs to someone else and anticipating a dream response is not in accordance with the Sunnah.
Yes and no answers
There are misguided practices where people write "yes" and "no" on pieces of paper and choose one at random after praying istikhara. However, this method is neither from the Sunnah nor supported by any Islamic texts; it is merely a game of chance.
Istikhara is not a magical incantation, nor does it require celestial signs. Our minds, once fixed on a decision, have an uncanny way of transforming the ordinary into omens: the inflection in a voice, the rescheduling of an appointment, or even the color of an object. When faced with significant choices, we often seek signs to steer us, perhaps to alleviate our own uncertainty or to shift the burden of responsibility should the outcome be unfavorable.
Signs for istikhara
It is essential to grasp the profound simplicity of the du'a taught by our Prophet ﷺ. Istikhara is a sincere prayer for guidance, a humble request for Allah to pave the way for what is beneficial and to divert us from what is detrimental. It is not a search for signs, but a plea for divine wisdom and clarity.
How long does istikhara take?
Consider how the du’a of istikhara asks Allah to either make a matter easy and blessed for us or to remove it if it is not good. Imagine planning to make a purchase, only for the contract to fall through, or planning to take a loan, only to find that it is no longer necessary. The essence of the istikhara du’a is seeking ease in our affairs, and sometimes that ease comes swiftly. At other times, the desired decision or outcome might take years to manifest. Delays in answered prayers often lead to outcomes far better than initially anticipated.
Take, for instance, Zakariya’s (as) prolonged wait for parenthood, which allowed him to care for Maryam (as). Or consider the Prophet’s ﷺ delayed Hajj, which led to the significant Treaty of Hudaibiyah, eventually resulting in the conquest of Makkah. The timing of istikhara du’a's response should not be a source of concern. Instead, one should cherish the closeness to Allah that develops while actively taking steps and trusting in His wisdom.
Does istikhara change with time?
The question of whether things change with time touches upon the deeper
concept of qadar. Often, the immediate outcomes of our actions may not seem favorable, yet they are part of Allah’s grand design for our personal and spiritual growth. Perhaps, your
istikhara was answered in a certain way for a period, only for the subsequent events to unfold in a manner that seems wholly negative. Does this imply a misunderstanding of your
istikhara? Not at all, for
istikhara is not about immediate clarity or guaranteed ease in life; there is no idea of a “positive
istikhara” or “negative
istikhara”. It is a request for divine guidance, and sometimes Allah’s guidance leads us through challenging paths to foster resilience and patience within us.
Trials and rejections are often the crucible in which our spiritual and mental fortitude is forged, drawing us nearer to Allah and strengthening our faith.